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Tawnja’s Treasures: Skorts: The Good, The Bad, or The Ugly

By Lavender July 31, 2008

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On the Runway Section

Minnesota summers are short, yet spectacular. I would dare to say that without them, we would lose half our residents to the year-round warmth of states like Arizona, Texas, and California. So, what keeps us planted here during our insanely frigid months of December and January? The memories we manufacture during June, July, and August, of course.

I have been fortunate enough this summer to amass enough spectacular memories on the golf course to survive all the way until next April.

I bet you didn’t know America has close to 16,000 golf courses. Minnesota has more golfers per capita than any other state. We consistently rank in the top 10 percent of environmentally friendly-designed courses. These are strange statistics when you consider we only have a window of about 120 days actually to chase that illusive little white ball across God’s green countryside.

Golfing is without a doubt one of my favorite guilty pleasures on a beautiful Minnesota summer afternoon. This summer, I have golfed Nemadji Golf Course in Wisconsin—a stunning example of Mother Nature; Shamrock Golf Course in Maple Grove—we refer to it as the pasture; Dwan Golf Course in Bloomington—cheap and easy to play; Hiawatha Golf Course in Minneapolis—bring a wheelbarrow of money for a public course; and The Rochester Golf & Country Club in Rochester—the mac daddy of golfing decadence.

Each of these courses is unique—from the city-owned public ones to the swanky private country clubs. Golf fashions are directly related directly to the rules and regulations of each venue.

Such fashions used to be extremely regulated, similar to what women were allowed to wear as swimming attire—long sleeves, long pants, and absolutely no shirts without collars. Today, a few of these traditions are still alive and kicking.

My Rochester golf outing was a tournament to raise money for Bear Creek Services, an organization for mentally and physically disabled adults and children. It was held at The Rochester Golf and Country Club—the grand dame of private clubs. I politely was informed prior to the event that no tank tops and no shirts without collars were to be worn on the course, and no visors were to be sported in the clubhouse.

After receiving my instructions, I perused my somewhat vast closet. Can you even believe it? I don’t own one shirt with a collar. I had tank tops galore—spaghetti strap summer camisoles—but no polo shirts.

I decided to wait until I arrived at the country club, and purchase an appropriate golf polo. Great Big Huge Expensive Fashion Boo-Boo! The only shirt that wasn’t designed for a hundred-year-old grandmother was $69—on sale. I told myself it was for charity, and handed over my Gold Card.

The good news was that I had the bottom half of my ensemble covered with my tried-and-true black Ann Taylor skort. I love my skort. It’s like a reverse mullet—skirt party in the front, and business shorts in the back. A skort is probably considered terrible fashion in New York or Paris—heck, probably even in North Dakota. But if the wind is blowing, or you’re riding in the cart, you are covered and comfy.

Summer 2008 is passing like a Porsche on the Autobahn, so get out there and golf, people. Our Creator worked his magic to provide us Minnesotans with a state worthy of enjoying this memory-producing guilty pleasure. Always remember: God loves all his children—especially you—and particularly the ones who chase that little white ball across His magical green countryside.

Visit <www.Tawnja.com> for more golf course info.

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