Horoscope for Apr. 10-23 They say every action has a reaction, and it is especially true this period, when feisty Mars conjuncts shocking Uranus. Want to get a few things done? Right now? Oh, stand back, world!
ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 20)
No secrets will be left, and no quiet behind-the-scenes diplomacy. Your usual finesse now eludes you. Every stealth footstep you try makes echoes, pounds, and sets off alarms. Why fight it, proud Ram? Don’t even try to hide yourself away. You cannot avoid that you are ready to rumble. Or, maybe the rumble comes to you. Feel something?
TAURUS (APRIL 21-MAY 21)
Something powerful is unleashed in a certain friendship. Maybe this means that you unexpectedly meet someone who can help open doors, and shake and bake. Maybe this means that one of your many social circles hits it big in some way. Whatever it is, get into the center of things, and watch your personal stock rise. You easily outperform the stock market, queer Bull.
GEMINI (MAY 22-JUNE 21)
You won’t have to worry about clawing and climbing to the top of the corporate heap this period, because your huge move will be far greater and more dramatic than the meager action that went into it. Little efforts can produce great rewards. Some of them might be unexpected and unanticipated, so be flexible to the point of bendable.
CANCER (JUNE 22-JULY 23)
Travel will have its many surprises this period. Gay Crabs with itchy claws not only will have a grand adventure, but also it will be much different than what they plan or expect. Remain open to the global possibilities, embracing anything new and unusual. If you plan on staying close to home, spice up your shell with some exotic spicy touches. No names, please!
LEO (JULY 24-AUGUST 23)
A light flirtation can catapult you into head-over-heels lust. At least, that is a strong possibility this period. Proud Lions will tend to act first, and give it some afterthought later, in any affairs of the heart. This can produce some shocking or surprising results. So, make your intentions known, and see which cream rises to the top. Or, is that your preferred position?
VIRGO (AUGUST 24-SEPTEMBER 23)
If something is unsaid, uncomfortable, or just plain annoying in any relationship, expect it to be unearthed and dissected this period. Queer Virgos feel that nothing should be held back. Catharsis is good, at least while it is being released. But consider the long-term impact of any action. Laugh, and the world laughs with you. Weep, and you sleep alone.
LIBRA (SEPTEMBER 24-OCTOBER 23)
Expect a few familiar routines to be upended this period. You not only find more efficient ways to do things, but also many of your nitpicky tasks are unimportant and expendable. Good. Proud Libras clear the clutter, and free themselves up for fun. Uh, but before you leave for your long lunch, be sure your colleagues feel the joy, too. Don’t just delegate.
SCORPIO (OCTOBER 24-NOVEMBER 22)
Expect a frantic, highly creative, and action-packed period, queer Scorpio. They say that genius is 99 percent perspiration and 1 percent inspiration. That is especially true for you now. Anything glorious and fun will be the result of your own strong efforts. So, don’t sit at home, waiting for the doorbell to ring. Get out there, and ring a few doorbells yourself. Ring-a-ding!
SAGITTARIUS (NOVEMBER 23-DECEMBER 22)
Expect things to go on the blink at home. Gay Archers hate to attend to domestic projects, but you cannot avoid them now. Electronics zap, walls split, and things just break. Take it all in stride, and use it as an opportunity to upgrade and improve your surroundings. By summer, you will have a shining showplace with all the latest gizmos. Plug in, and feel the surge.
CAPRICORN (DECEMBER 23-JANUARY 20)
Pink Caps may try to be graceful and diplomatic, but it is not in the cards this period. Your smooth, sweet milk of human kindness may curdle. It seems that the best way to handle any disagreement is to agree to disagree now. You will have plenty of time deftly to hammer your point home at the end of the month. Keep your nails hidden for now.
AQUARIUS (JANUARY 21-FEBRUARY 19)
Watch your bottom line this period, Aqueerius. You not only are especially frivolous and wasteful, but also may not get what you expect or pay for. Investments can plummet or leap, but you have no way of planning for their direction. Avoid the risk. My advice is to lock up your wallet, and find some cheap thrills to occupy your time. Hmm. Anyone we know?
PISCES (FEBRUARY 20-MARCH 20)
You make a strong first impression, Guppie—maybe a bit too strong for your comfort. If you find yourself in new and important social circles, try to remain calm, cool, collected, and in the background. The scene will heat up, as you try to stay aloof. Yet, maybe a splash is needed to douse the out-of-control fires? Just make sure that this splash is not gasoline.
© 2009 THE STARRY EYE, LLC. All Rights Reserved. For Entertainment Purposes Only. Lichtenstein’s blog <www.thestarryeye.typepad.com> covers everything New Age. Her astrology book HerScopes: A Guide to Astrology for Lesbians is the best in tongue-in-cheek astrology.