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Out in the Stars

By Lavender December 19, 2008

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Horoscope for Dec. 19-Jan. 1 Sometimes, we just need a jolly little “push” to get things done. Well, maybe not Christmas shopping, but other things. No sooner said than done, when Sun enters Capricorn and conjuncts Mars. A less-than-attractive opportunity suddenly becomes a must-have. Get a frog under the mistletoe, and watch as it turns into royalty. Or maybe not?

ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 20)
Gay Rams feel like they are on the short end of a professional stick, but this period turns sticks into golden divining rods or maybe golden parachutes. Try your best. Step up to the corporate plate, and hit a home run. You have many more resources at your disposal than you think. Santa says that you have been nice. Maybe its time to be naughty…or underhanded.

TAURUS (APRIL 21-MAY 21)
You probably have been traveling more, but enjoying it less. Take heart, queer Bull, a good lesson is to be learned from all your travels and travails. Everything falls into place this period. Who knows? You may learn a thing or two that will prove to be extremely rewarding on many levels through the new year. Vodka in eggnog may be one of those lessons.

GEMINI (MAY 22-JUNE 21)
Heat up your sexuality this period, but allow lovers and potential lovers a long, long rope—maybe for lassoing…ho, ho, ho. You might be surprised at the range of desirable matches available to you this period. The secret is to take your time, and choose carefully. So many beautifully wrapped packages are under the tree, but what does each box contain?

CANCER (JUNE 22-JULY 23)
Just when you are tempted to toss it all away in a particular relationship, you are pushed to rearrange your priorities this period. During this season of goodwill, try to forgive those wet towels on the floor or dirty underwear on the pillow. Your current relationship has much to recommend it. Gay Crabs should not take any firm stands now. Try reclining or prone. Ahem.

LEO (JULY 24-AUGUST 23)
Even if you feel like a mangy old rat on a treadmill, this period is a bit more festive at work. Even the most onerous job becomes a little more interesting and lucrative. Try to learn as much as you can from every little boring task. Proud Lions soon begin to see the light at the end of the tunnel at work. Let’s hope it’s not the headlight of an oncoming train.

VIRGO (AUGUST 24-SEPTEMBER 23)
If too much is piled on your goodie plate this period, don’t panic. You may be feeling a holiday fatigue, but you are certainly no slouch when the party train pulls into the station. All play and no work makes proud Virgins susceptible to a layoff. Use this opportunity to hone your more artistic and creative skills, and apply them to the job. Err…so, what’s your motivation?

LIBRA (SEPTEMBER 24-OCTOBER 23)
Queer Libras may find their home life a center of activity during this holiday period. Take the bitter with the better in any family situation. Who knows what breakthroughs are possible now? The secret is to strive for mutual respect, if you possibly can. Of course, they may have their inane opinions, but as long as you remain proudly true to yourself (and spike the nog), you prevail.

SCORPIO (OCTOBER 24-NOVEMBER 22)
Gay Scorps may inherit a rare case of foot in mouth this period. But all’s well that ends well, as the frank opinion you blurt out may be just the bit of fresh air needed to get things on track again. Say what you mean after careful consideration. Perhaps it’s time to write your new year’s manifesto. Then, use it to manifest your destiny. Whoo hoo! No names, please.

SAGITTARIUS (NOVEMBER 23-DECEMBER 22)
Money lessons hit fast and furious this period. All that glitters may not be gold, so get your values in sync with your personal finances. A holiday shopping spree puts you in the hole, but could prove to be a valuable lesson. Hmm. Perhaps gay Archers should Scrooge it up, tamp it down, and save their pennies for the after Christmas sales. How boring!

CAPRICORN (DECEMBER 23-JANUARY 20)
More than enough jolly activity is going on in your life this period. Pink Caps should take their pride to the streets, while this festive energy propels you into the limelight, and makes you a star. Be kind and magnanimous to all. You never know who will figure prominently in your life’s goals. It would be a shame to snub ’em before you get a chance to rubadub them.

AQUARIUS (JANUARY 21-FEBRUARY 19)
A spark of intuition leads to new rewards this period. Aqueerians best are served by volunteering for the less fortunate this holiday season. The problem is that you may not see this work as a glamorous role. But grab it while you can, and make it a social connector. Once you finish the tough work, you will be poised and ready to rub elbows with the tinseled, deep-pocketed set. Ho, ho, ho.

PISCES (FEBRUARY 20-MARCH 20)
Who knows what pals are capable of during this holiday period? Try not to be too suspicious of all the friendly goings-on. You may jump to the wrong conclusions, and upset the applecart of true comradeship. Go with the flow, Guppie, and dance to their tune. In fact, the group may direct you to your life’s mission (or a great gift), so stop kvetching, and listen!

© 2008 THE STARRY EYE, LLC. All Rights Reserved. For Entertainment Purposes Only. Lichtenstein’s blog <www.thestarryeye.typepad.com> covers everything New Age. Her astrology book HerScopes: A Guide To Astrology For Lesbians is the best in tongue-in-cheek astrology.

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