Lucky Bitch Radio with Wanda Wisdom

I find this fellow almost impossible to listen to. It’s only because you are being patient, Wanda, and working hard to understand his perspective that I’m sticking with it.

He is soooo young. His arguments are infantile, illogical, simplistic. He has just enough of a superficial dabbling in enough topics to be truly dangerous.

He is inarticulate, and indulges in what must be ackowledged as a delightfully politically-incorrect paternalistic, condescending drivel and then passes it off as an act of integrity. Which I suppose is true - there are idiots out there who have tremendous integrity in their idiotness.

Children need a “mom and a dad”? Tell that to the 60% of straight families torn apart by divorce. How about children benefit from both male and female role models when growing up, and same sex parents are well-served by having a wide circle of male, female, transgendered, straight, gay, lesbian, bi and multicultural role models. I mean, DUH.

Or his anecdote that his friends don’t typically refer to their partners as my wife, or my husband… well, come on Aaron, it’s hardly been out there long enough for a litmus test. People use language that reflects their reality, and since so few can marry, how can they use the language? Were I to marry a woman I would call her my wife… it’s all a part of a natural evolution.

He uses scaremongering stories (if we legalize gay marriage, the churches will be forced to marry gays… his defensive response: “well, you never know!”), the thin edge of the wedge bludgeon that the anti-gay or anti-legal marriage lobby always defaults to. It’s the same argument they use about everything: “You are trying to make the world gay.”

I agree… let churches do the marrying, and government do civil unions. Ideal for everyone.

He says he wants to bring everyone together, that we all have to compromise, politics shouldn’t be about fighting… and in the same breath he says of GLBT people advocating for same sex marriage: “SHUT UP ALREADY.” I don’t find that speaks to the compassion he professes to operate under. How come when he is

“I’m not going to prostrate myself to devices special underist groups…”

What??? Well, one thing is clear. He is DEFINITELY a Republican.

Kudos for you for an exceptionally well-done interview, with thoughtful and thought-provoking questions/comments that demonstrated both a sophisticated grasp of the complex nature of the discussion, and good interview prep. Excellent handling of what could have been Maury Povitch hour.

A gal pal from the west coast,
Laurie, Bisexual

Great interview. I applaud him for having the courage to come on and speak with you. It’s great that there are young idealistic people wanting to become part of the political process. I also think it’s great that Aaron has the courage of his convictions, but I feel that it took a LONG time and a really muddled long way around to clarify his real position. He needs to develop his talking points much better if he doesn’t want to get stuck in people’s assumptive evalutaions.

That said, I think that Wanda is correct in pointing out that the “separate but equal” semantics of calling it marriage for straight people and civil unions for gays is not the solution. I think that Aaron is onto something in resisting the divisive politics of using the gay marriage issue, but the real revelation should be to see that the two party system we have is the problem, not to choose a side and say that the other has been worse. He is very resistant to what he sees as the “gay agenda”, which is not that at all, but a tenacious and pointed position by people who feel that their most basic rights are being abridged. it is a logical impossibilty for a minority to impose it’s will on the majority. This is not what’s going on here. It’s a minority saying that we have to have a level playing field, and that IF the government is going to be involved, it has to treat everyone equally.

Now, my view is that the government shouldn’t be involved in marriage, partnerships, unions at all. individuals can govern their own linkage through contract, and they get to decide what their particular legal linkage is. The courts should recognize these contracts on an individual basis, and NO other parties should have any right to intervene. We recognize basic contract law in every other aspect of life, why not in marriages? Why should a birth family have ANY say at all in the estate of a sound person who chooses to give his money and possessions to his lover, his dog, his Anna Nicole, or his favorite gay bar? By the same token, why should the government say that any person can’t have the right to have their loved one by their side making medical decisions? All you queers out there: Start making contracts with your loved ones, have them supervised by competent legal counsel, and we can create a fair system using the courts. Fuck the legislators, who are all beholden to special interests of one sort or the other.

He seems very sincere in his beliefs.

With an adverse and conservative upbringing its no surprise that he has established a ridged set of rules with which to interperet the world around him.

Thanks Wanda for an excellent interview.

It was clear to me that he was traumatized growing up and being rejected by his homophobic parents. It is very sad. I don’t think he is aware of his own internalized homophobia. I think he has identified with his oppressors -conservatives and republicans-.
While listening to him talk about marriage I kept wishing that Wanda would ask him “would you like to be married and have your marriage recognized as legal, valid and EQUAL to those of men and women? I basically feel sad and sorry for this young man who hasn’t found a way yet to realize how damaged he has been by our homophobic and heterosexist society.

I’m glad you had the patience to have this interview, and I am so sorry that our government’s foster care system failed Mr. Maloy to the extent that the failure has clearly shaped an outlook that to me seems a bit limited and rather confused. I fail to understand why we can’t have conversations on local, state and federal level to make our tax dollars a good, efficient investment with spending priorities that assist people rather than corporations and money hoarders. Living in this world of resistance in which we slash and burn government services with disastrous results (e.g. of many e.g.’s: the CDC’s response to the onset of the AIDS epidemic was seriously hampered by the Reagan Admnistration’s cutting of their budget with deadly results), avoiding the cold hard reality that we will always have taxes and government, and I am deeply afraid that if Mr. Maloy’s aims were carried out, the situation would only become much, much worse for people who find themselves in situations such as his.

What seems to get lost in all of this discussion of gay marriage is that the suggestion that gay couples contracturalize their relationships is not only massively classist and naive but also a false solution. To think that all gay couples can afford legal cousel supports the false notion that the GLBT population is a socoioeconomically homogeneous population with incomes that support such things. Furthermore, no contract will afford gay couples immigration rights, rights to spousal social security benefits, the right to not testify agaisnt one’s own spouse in a court of law, and hundreds of other benefits. I find it massively absurd that the onus should be on ourselves to educate the gay population to take the initiative to create of these contractural relationships when straight couples enjoy the privilege of not having to do so. Suggesting that we pay hundreds if not thousands of dollars to create partial solutions that a comparatively small fee for a marriage license would solve is ludicrous. Also, the financial and productivity cost of granting gay couples equal rights piece by piece via legislation is a disservice to our cities, states, and country when the inequality can be solved quickly and efficiently via marriage or (if we must) civil unions granting ALL rights and privileges but the ability to use the word. The solution here is rather simple, and as Dick Cheney said, people should have the right to enter whatever relationships they want to enter.

While I am glad that Mr. Maloy is seemingly aware of global gay issues such as the plight of GLBT’s in the near east, I am a bit disheartened that he seems to use the comparative situations to insinuate that we should be happy with the status quo when there is so much available to us in the realm of GLBT rights that will make the country stronger, better, and greater.

Finally, my greatest hope for Mr. Maloy and all Americans is that he and they develop a nuanced empathy that creates an interest in bettering the lives of people with situations vastly different than their own and an understanding that there are more forces at play than just individual responsibility (and in the creation of a sense of personal responsibility) when it comes to realizing one’s potential in this world.

Wanda,

thank you for having this idiot on your show. you showed him much more respect than i could have.

i had to turn off the interview a couple of times then go back to it because i believe he needs a good ass kicking.

the previous posts are great and i’m not sure i can really add anything, but here we go.

young - he is young. he hasn’t had the time to really develop much of his own philosophy, honest or not. he has not lived with a ‘partner’ for twenty years, signed all the legal documents willing their estates to each other, just to have an estranged family member come and say, ‘no, that belongs to me’.

doesn’t do his homework - he admits to only know what is going on in ma. he doesn’t read what is going on in the rest of the county. many of the gay protection initiatives in the country were in states where there were no lawsuits requesting gay marriage. many of these denied any kind of civil union as wanda pointed out. doesn’t want to know that people are dying in iraq for a war that was based on ‘fixing the facts around the policy’. aren’t there any soldiers from his state coming home dead or injured?

it’s hard work - thank god he didn’t say those words, i would have thrown up. why are the republicans always complaining how hard it is to serve the public. it is hard to be a biggot. constantly searching for others to feel superior to. wish wanda asked him if he was a racist. reminding him that this is an ‘honest program’. (wanda i love you, but i hate the way you say program.

its ok to be pro life and be democrat - it’s wrong, but it’s possible. it is certainly no reason to vote for george bush. i have never met a person who wanted to have an abortion, but i do have friends that needed one and their privacy was paramount! the majority (~60%) feel it should be legal, but rare.

taxes - the taxes have been an increasing burden on the middle and lower classes and a giveaway to the upper class since reagan.

mom’s & dad’s - sorry his birth parents were not the cleavers. he is not the only person to have had problem growing up, or paid his own way through college. he lectures that children should have both a mom and a dad. but then admits that children raised in gay homes statistically do better than average. Wanda, EXTRA POINTS for pointing out that children also want a million dollars or a candy bar or a pony! the question should have been “do you feel loved, by both your parents, male or female?” foster children are better off in a loving home than bouncing around to families that take them in for the money and then throw them out when there is a problem. a friend of mine has adopted three of these. we live in illinois and he is the first single gay man to be given full parental rights to a child in the state.

religion vs. government - so he believes that marriages should be a man and a woman because it is a religious sacrement. Kudos to wanda for her position regarding respect for religion but equal civil unions under the law. sounded like this was mr. republican’s first time hearing such an idea. why could he say that in his little trump speach right from the start. is it possible that this is the first he ever considered such a thing. goes to show he really hasn’t thought it through. maybe he is too busy working hard to think about such things. thank the higher power that there is a 31 yeard old fabulous sober drag queen in mn to help him out.

boot straps - i could not believe he actually used this term. wanda, you could have said, ‘how wonderful for you, but what about all the people that were not born white, adopted by a middle class family, had the intelligence, drive, and decent looks to make it in business, should those people be happy with a lower level of success because they didn’t have all those things going for them?” democrats believe in trying to help level the playing field. taking care of those who cannot do for themselves because of physical, mental, or psychological disabilities. that is what the taxes are for.

sorry for the length of my rant. every fiber of my being is wanting to shake that baby until he wakes up from his hypnotized state of i’m gay and conservative, don’t do my homework, complain about how hard campaining is, gonna give up public service and go back to school if i don’t win, workaholic (there is probably a twelve-step program for that) gay but don’t have any friends, republican.

god bless,
peace,
scottm

Hello, I felt that the guest had some valid points about the alliance between the pro-choice groups and the glbt groups where the HRC finds being pro-choice more importaint than your views on glbt equality.
http://gaypatriot.net/2005/08/15/abortion-rights-are-not-gay-rights

I just feel that GLBT groups should just be neutral on that issue and be independent on their own on the pro-choice or anti-abortion side.

I do feel there is a legitamate argument about closing the gay marriage issue because people unfortunately see it as a religous issue and they still do not want to offer this opportunity via the ballot box. We have lost all of the battles. Perhaps civil unions as introduced in CT and VT would be a more viable opportunity to put value in our relationships and would be not as opposed as gay marriage.

Wanda I applaud you for having a diverse segment of guests. I thought you and Aaron had valid points on the multitude of issues that were dealt with.

I’m sorry wanda…but this man is a fucking idiot. His views genuinely disgust me. You are most surely a better person than I am, but i would have never given this goddamn dumbass the time of day to spin his wheel of shit.

Nothing against you though, just saying what i think honaye!:)

Wanda i have to agree with Justin this man is a fucking idiot. Sounds like he needs to get a Life! or get laid……
great job in putting up with this man!
great job wanda!!!!!!!!!!
keep up the great work! love the podcast!

Hi Wanda! I love your show! I have to say, though, that this guy is probably the most unlikable interviewee of any kind since Yolanda Saldizar, the woman who killed Selena.

What really pissed me off was his complaint that so many Democratic “interest groups” with seemingly unrelated causes (i.e, the teachers’ union, gay lobby and abortion lobby) banded together into one coalition to increase their power. That’s how the game is played, darlin’. And Republicans play it just as well. For example, what does Christianity really have to do with war? But the Republicans consolidated their power by combining the right-wing Christian voting bloc, the neo-Conservative voting bloc, and the hawkish pro-war bloc in order to create a huge federal political “machine” of their own. It’s been going on forever in both the Democratic and Republican parties. Further, the reason these groups operate like “machines” on a state level is because they have to–they’ve been TOTALLY abandoned on a federal level in favor of the military. Bush has declared war on all social service programs with his budget cuts. But what they hell–that could just be the kick in the ass the poor kids need! It could be the makin’ of ‘em (hey, I don’t want to get left off the cliche bandwagon:-))! Much better to let them “pull themselves up by their boot straps,” or more likely, learn to get along by robbery and violence.

But who knows? This guy seems just misanthropic enough to really succeed with Republicans, so I’m sure he’ll be elected and thereby avoid further education. And even though he’s gay, they might forgive him for it since he’s self-loathing enough.

Hi Wanda,

Great show, I thought you could of been a bit harder on him, and I can tell you were going to ask “Have you EVER been in a relationship, but you didn’t. You just asked if he was in one currently. To bad I wanted to know.

This guy, only being 24, sounds like he has never been in love. Mind you his growing up was sounded harsh, but I don’t think he will understand a union until he has been with someone more then a few years or months. The saying is “He don’t know”. What I care about is, that his innocence in the world of love will stop others from having legal freedom. I really hope he doesn’t make it to office. I do hope he falls in love.

A happy Canadian
David

Hey there,

Thank you Wanda for having this person on you show to share views and opinions about life and politics.
I couldn’t agree more with the previous comments about this man. Especially about his arguments, I found it very dumb and not professional to use an argument like: come on, when one says marriage, you can’t put gay before the word; gay marriage ? that doesn’t sounds right ?
This kind of arguments should not be used by politicians, from whom we expect articulate and genuine-argument-based speach.

Besides this, He sounded totally ignorant when he spoke about Iraq. “those people are living a better life now, then in the “pre-invasion” Iraq” “we can give them our way of life, because its much better”.
Clearly this person, as many americans in my opinion, haven’t got a clue, of what is actually happening in the world.
Iraq is one the most crappy places to live in right now. Many people are being murdered, everyday, because of the way american army handled the situation there.
Iraq is now in more shit than before the war ! There was indeed no liberty, but there was safety, order, water, electricity and food ! No the country is plunged in this awful civil war with mass killing, torture, chaos and a violation of human rights and dignity !
And that is the result of the lack of preparation and arrogance that the americans took with them when the went to Iraq, and that’s mostly the fault of the American government, wich happens to be largely Republican !
How can somebody support this party !?!

Have a nice day everyone !!!

Wanda, thoughts on your guest.

-He made a good point about people who say they support gay rights as a political tool and they use that platform as a way to get votes. I think a lot of democrats use that as a way to appease their liberal base. However, your guest is guilty of the same kind of political manipulation. He says he is pro life yet he is a man and he is gay and will NEVER have to make or come close to making a decision about having an abortion so how can he say whether or not the right to choose is a good or bad thing. Your guest says he’s pro-life so many times its almost like a mantra. I get it, you’re not for abortions, great, so don’t have one.

-On his rant about taxes: Taxes help people who are poor because they provide funds for things like foster care, welfare, food banks, school lunches, etc. When republicans use this tax rhetoric they don’t address an important point. The people who benefit MOST from social programs are people who don’t pay taxes because they don’t make enough money to tax. Those are the people who need help the most and i doubt our economy will benefit if those people are left with absolutely nothing while those who are above their standard of living have an extra few hundred dollars a year in their pockets.

-”Children also want a million dollars and they want a pony.” Witty and relevant response. Classic Wanda, I LOVE IT!

-He keeps talking about the influence of the special interest groups as if its almost exclusively something that happens to democrats and liberals. Need I remind your guest that the former house majority leader was indicted earlier this year because of his philanderings with special interests. Also the senate majority leader is suspected of being influenced by outside forces do to his own personal investments into certain health care prospects.

-”They know I’m not homophobic.” Nobody said you were.

-”…marriage is an inherently religious institution and they [the constituents] don’t think the government should enforce our churches…” Nobody is asking churches to do anything, red herring. “I don’t think the government should be supporting things that churches don’t want to.” Churches are not legislative bodies, their leaders are not elected by the people and they do not represent the will of the people. Have you read our constitution lately?

-”It’s about compromise.” How can you have compromise when republicans refuse to even draft any kind of compromising legislation and instead push DOMA (Defense of Marriage Act) legislation that in effect say, “You cannot! End of discussion!”

-”Neither party is more virtuous than the other.” I would like to know then what is more virtuous about the Republican party for you?

-”I looked at John Kerry’s resume.” And you compared it to GB’s? Did you read the same resumes as I did? I see one man who has a distinguished Senate career and another who was a failed businessman in the oil industry, a failure as a manager of a major league baseball team, a failure as a governor, and by the approval ratings at the end of his first term was a failure of a President.

All I could think of when he kept using the word “assimilation” is that race of cyborgs that kept trying to take over the universe.

It would be interesting to have a follow-up interview with Aaron when he finds someone special, been in a relationship for a few years and discovers for himself the relevancy of gay marriage in the eye of the law….

Excellent show Wanda. I am most proud that you did not let him drop his inaccurate statements and then move on.

24, no long term relationship, homophobic parents, republican. There is no wonder he has the views that he has. He just has a whole lot of growing up to do. I predict that in 15 years he’ll look back at his views now and marvel how much they have changed.

Aaron has valid points about the corrupt political machine in Massachusetts. I also think that single-interest groups (be they conservative or liberal) are blights on the democratic process.

Other than that, his beliefs are extemely ill formed, illogical, and inconsistent. I honestly feel that he is doing a bit of a disservice to gay Republicans who may be able to speak more eloquently on various issues. Of course we could all play armchair-psychologist considering his upbringing, but it’s not even necessary to go there.

I nearly spit out my Diet Canada Dry when he said something to the effect of “uh, last time I looked up marriage in the dictionary, it said husband and wife!” That’s….. interesting legal analysis. We could spend all day refuting each one of his contentions and propositions, but I think I’ll focus on destroying George Allen instead Bigger fish and all.

I thought that the interview was very well done. Wanda seemed to be on top of it all the way. It takes a good interviewer to keep up with a politician.
As for Aaron, I have to say that some of what he said made sense. One of the points he made about “marriage or nothing” seemed to me to be spot on.
Here in the UK gay couples now have the same equal partnership rights as hetero’s. That I think has something to do with the seperation of “Holy Matromony” from the argument.
I have never realy understood why gay people would want anything to do with the Church anyway!
Civil Unions are now seen as a respectable solid commitment for gay couples.
I also think that siding with the Pro Choice brigade is also a problem. Whilst I agree with peoples right to abortion, this isn’t our fight.
I hold my hands up and say that I don’t realy understand American politics so I guess I’m not realy in a position to comment and I appologies if my views are frowned upon.
One other point, in the UK laws are made at a national level, so that all people in the UK have the same rights (or lack off). It is strange to hear that one person has to live with one set of laws and yet someone living a few miles away lives under a different set of laws in the US.
Anyway, great show Wanda.

im not even going to leave an intelegent comment

this episode made me want to act out, violently.

such a fuckface, and hes ugly.

C’mon Will, let’s be fair. He may be a fuckface, but he’s definitely not ugly… (an all you bitches out there know that you were swooning over his pitcher ‘afore y’all heard him speak!)

He just sounded like any other faceless politician.
When Wanda challenged his positions, instead of justifying them, he tended to just attack other groups and politicians.
Same old same old.

On the criticism of different groups banding together for strength - ‘I disagree with them and note that they’re stronger together; therefore uniting causes is a bad thing’ - it sounds like conservative sour grapes.

“an all you bitches out there know that you were swooning over his pitcher ‘afore y’all heard him speak!”

Umm…no…not so much. Sorry. I doubt that any of us are “swooners.” We’re a little too pissed off these days to be in The Babysitters Club.

“We’re a little too pissed off these days…”

Awwww, why are liberals always so bitter/pissed/angry?? Life is grand honey, only you have the power to make yourself happy. Blaming George Bush and all the other conservatives will do no one any good.

Watch that blood pressure!

Love your show Wanda!
-CC

Ditto on all the comments about how patient and respectful you were. You addressed the issues, facts and views but never him. Loved it. Good work Wanda. You are a pro.

Dave…

Interesting topic… I’m working in this industry myself and I don’t agree about this in 100%, but I added your page to my bookmarks and hope to see more interesting articles in the future…